Welcome to 2019, friends!

As you surely know, this is the time of year that everyone’s making resolutions and setting all sorts of amazing goals.

I’ve never been much of a goal setter but I do have some life ambitions that I aspire to live by and this time of year always reminds me of how I can make some shifts and changes to make those a little more reachable and attainable.

The other night as I was sitting and watching a good ol’ documentary on Netflix, I had a (not so) random thought: “what are the lies I have believed this year that have held me back and how can I change those to help me become a more confident, better me in the new year?'“

And that thought, my friends, is how I landed here sharing how we can conquer the monster within that desperately seeks to devour our souls and keep us from being the healthy and whole humans we are meant to be.

With that in mind, here are 5 lies you and I just cannot afford to bring into the new year and how we can go about shifting that mindset:

THE LIE

you’re not good enough | mom friend wife woman

THE TRUTH

Oh man. This one. I don’t know where it started for you. Perhaps someone in your life told you repeatedly that you weren’t capable. Maybe there was just this little voice of insecurity that lied to you and told you weren’t good enough. For me, there’s this long line of history that and repeated situations of failures in my life that I believed and that dictated false truth to me. The truth of the matter is that you and I—we are more than what we do. Regardless of what life or the enemy of our souls attempts to tell us we can listen to the truth of the Word and what “it” tells us. Our Creator knows us, made us and has purposed us for so much more than we can imagine. You’re not only good enough, friend. You are

READ | PHILIPPIANS 4:8

THE LIE

you’ll never complete the goals or tasks you set out to complete

THE TRUTH

I think the lie that we may actually believe here is that we can do it all and that if we put our minds to it, we can achieve anything. I’d like to believe that most of us have awakened to the truth of this lie that we have far too long allowed to captivate us. Truth is, we cannot do it all and we were never made to. That reality, in and of itself, is liberating and frees us to do the things we were actually made to do, well. Culture will do it’s best to tell you and I that we should do exactly what everyone else is doing. It will lull and bribe us into becoming shells of people who express no real or unique traits set us apart (and ultimately connect us) one from the other. You were made to do all the things you were called to do by Him and with Him but not to do EVERYTHING you want to do.

This year, I’d like to hone in on a couple of things I am passionate about and really lean into those things with my whole heart. I think there’s something to be said for that type of focus.

READ | ROMANS 12:1-2

THE LIE

that your body (OR WHO YOU ARE) isn’t beautiful just the way it is

THE TRUTH

I’m 40. Enough said. Just kidding. Kind of. I’ve had four kids and needless to say after all I’ve been through, this body will just never be the same. As I’ve gotten older, I’ve come to embrace that truth more and more. There’s no quick fix for the heart and no surgeon on this planet who can make me believe I am beautiful no matter the augmentation. At the end of the day, I have to search deep within myself to find truth from God about what beauty actually is. If my heart is not in the right place, it doesn’t matter what my physical body looks like. If we’re setting goals, then mine is to make sure that I am allowing God to set my standard for beauty in this season and not Instagram, TV shows or what I see in magazines. This is a sermon that will never get old.

READ | COLOSSIANS 3:24

THE LIE

that your house isn’t pretty, big or fancy enough

THE TRUTH

Dear ones, if anyone understands this one, it’s me. We’ve lived almost 13 years in homes that haven’t belonged to us. To this day, even as I type, this is my story. The home we are currently in isn’t even our own. Still. So, for those of you out there struggling with the feeling that your home is nothing compared to what you see on the “internets” can I grant you one ounce of truth to carry you through your days: theirs isn’t all that either and furthermore, yours doesn’t need to be. What I mean is don’t let the internet and what folks out there want you to see (myself included if I’m completely honest) fool you. Real talk.

No one wants to walk into a space that’s perfectly put together, feels stuffy and that you just can’t seem to quite settle into. Focus more on making the home of your heart a space that you and others enjoy and you’ll experience a trickle down effect in your physical home.

READ | PHILIPPIANS 4:11-12

THE LIE

that people don’t like you

THE TRUTH

Maybe they don’t. Whoa. I know. Harsh? Not really. The simple truth here is that it’s just part of life. Some people won’t get you, see you or may even downright hate you. But on the other side of that truth is the fact that that’s not really any of your business. I wasted far too much of my life (and perhaps you have as well) worrying about things I may have said that could have offended or (eh hmm) made someone feel insecure about what they are or are not doing in life. I will speak specifically to the mama’s, the women, the girls and all the ladies here: it is not your job to ensure the world is pleased with you and all that you do. It’s just not. It is our job, however, to be sure that our intentions are pure and that our hearts are set on pleasing Him over people. People are fickle. He isn’t. All of this just makes for less complication in relationship and life.

Find your team, your tribe or your people, show up for them, hold them close and be grateful for those you are blessed to call friends. One of the biggest thing that will hold you back in life and business is attempting to make friends with everyone at toxic levels. You just can’t please everyone. Not even Jesus did. Think about that. But what He DID do for the most part (there is that whole human thing that He also experienced) is keep focused on His purpose for being in the first place. We can all definitely learn something from that.

READ | PROVERBS 29:25

So that’s it, friends. My (not so) resolutions for life. Not just 2019.

What are some of yours? LMK in the comments below.

xo,

Kennesha