5 LIES YOU CANNOT AFFORD TO BRING INTO 2019 | MY (NOT SO) NEW YEAR’S RESOLUTIONS

Welcome to 2019, friends!

As you surely know, this is the time of year that everyone’s making resolutions and setting all sorts of amazing goals.

I’ve never been much of a goal setter but I do have some life ambitions that I aspire to live by and this time of year always reminds me of how I can make some shifts and changes to make those a little more reachable and attainable.

The other night as I was sitting and watching a good ol’ documentary on Netflix, I had a (not so) random thought: “what are the lies I have believed this year that have held me back and how can I change those to help me become a more confident, better me in the new year?'“

And that thought, my friends, is how I landed here sharing how we can conquer the monster within that desperately seeks to devour our souls and keep us from being the healthy and whole humans we are meant to be.

With that in mind, here are 5 lies you and I just cannot afford to bring into the new year and how we can go about shifting that mindset:

THE LIE

you’re not good enough | mom friend wife woman

THE TRUTH

Oh man. This one. I don’t know where it started for you. Perhaps someone in your life told you repeatedly that you weren’t capable. Maybe there was just this little voice of insecurity that lied to you and told you weren’t good enough. For me, there’s this long line of history that and repeated situations of failures in my life that I believed and that dictated false truth to me. The truth of the matter is that you and I—we are more than what we do. Regardless of what life or the enemy of our souls attempts to tell us we can listen to the truth of the Word and what “it” tells us. Our Creator knows us, made us and has purposed us for so much more than we can imagine. You’re not only good enough, friend. You are

READ | PHILIPPIANS 4:8

THE LIE

you’ll never complete the goals or tasks you set out to complete

THE TRUTH

I think the lie that we may actually believe here is that we can do it all and that if we put our minds to it, we can achieve anything. I’d like to believe that most of us have awakened to the truth of this lie that we have far too long allowed to captivate us. Truth is, we cannot do it all and we were never made to. That reality, in and of itself, is liberating and frees us to do the things we were actually made to do, well. Culture will do it’s best to tell you and I that we should do exactly what everyone else is doing. It will lull and bribe us into becoming shells of people who express no real or unique traits set us apart (and ultimately connect us) one from the other. You were made to do all the things you were called to do by Him and with Him but not to do EVERYTHING you want to do.

This year, I’d like to hone in on a couple of things I am passionate about and really lean into those things with my whole heart. I think there’s something to be said for that type of focus.

READ | ROMANS 12:1-2

THE LIE

that your body (OR WHO YOU ARE) isn’t beautiful just the way it is

THE TRUTH

I’m 40. Enough said. Just kidding. Kind of. I’ve had four kids and needless to say after all I’ve been through, this body will just never be the same. As I’ve gotten older, I’ve come to embrace that truth more and more. There’s no quick fix for the heart and no surgeon on this planet who can make me believe I am beautiful no matter the augmentation. At the end of the day, I have to search deep within myself to find truth from God about what beauty actually is. If my heart is not in the right place, it doesn’t matter what my physical body looks like. If we’re setting goals, then mine is to make sure that I am allowing God to set my standard for beauty in this season and not Instagram, TV shows or what I see in magazines. This is a sermon that will never get old.

READ | COLOSSIANS 3:24

THE LIE

that your house isn’t pretty, big or fancy enough

THE TRUTH

Dear ones, if anyone understands this one, it’s me. We’ve lived almost 13 years in homes that haven’t belonged to us. To this day, even as I type, this is my story. The home we are currently in isn’t even our own. Still. So, for those of you out there struggling with the feeling that your home is nothing compared to what you see on the “internets” can I grant you one ounce of truth to carry you through your days: theirs isn’t all that either and furthermore, yours doesn’t need to be. What I mean is don’t let the internet and what folks out there want you to see (myself included if I’m completely honest) fool you. Real talk.

No one wants to walk into a space that’s perfectly put together, feels stuffy and that you just can’t seem to quite settle into. Focus more on making the home of your heart a space that you and others enjoy and you’ll experience a trickle down effect in your physical home.

READ | PHILIPPIANS 4:11-12

“It is not your job to ensure the world is pleased with you and all that you do. It’s just not. ”

THE LIE

that people don’t like you

THE TRUTH

Maybe they don’t. Whoa. I know. Harsh? Not really. The simple truth here is that it’s just part of life. Some people won’t get you, see you or may even downright hate you. But on the other side of that truth is the fact that that’s not really any of your business. I wasted far too much of my life (and perhaps you have as well) worrying about things I may have said that could have offended or (eh hmm) made someone feel insecure about what they are or are not doing in life. I will speak specifically to the mama’s, the women, the girls and all the ladies here: it is not your job to ensure the world is pleased with you and all that you do. It’s just not. It is our job, however, to be sure that our intentions are pure and that our hearts are set on pleasing Him over people. People are fickle. He isn’t. All of this just makes for less complication in relationship and life.

Find your team, your tribe or your people, show up for them, hold them close and be grateful for those you are blessed to call friends. One of the biggest thing that will hold you back in life and business is attempting to make friends with everyone at toxic levels. You just can’t please everyone. Not even Jesus did. Think about that. But what He DID do for the most part (there is that whole human thing that He also experienced) is keep focused on His purpose for being in the first place. We can all definitely learn something from that.

READ | PROVERBS 29:25

So that’s it, friends. My (not so) resolutions for life. Not just 2019.

What are some of yours? LMK in the comments below.

xo,

Kennesha

INSPIRE | SUNDAY NIGHT INSPIRATION | A SAFE PLACE TO LAND

A FEW WORDS ABOUT SUNDAY NIGHT INSPIRATION

I started this series almost four years ago over on my other blog before I switched things over here. I gave it a go for months as I felt I was led to and then after about 6 months, the desire and the passion or felt need to continue with the series fizzled and I was on to other things.

Just recently, I’ve felt the urge to offer encouraging reading once again on Sunday evenings so this is my attempt to lighten your load with a bit of inspiration and encouragement to carry you through your week and to help start it off just right.

I’m not sure what this will become but my hope is that this will be a space where you feel free to come, take deep sighs of relief, breath a bit more lightly and create community around one common goal and thread: freedom. This Sunday space is a place where I hope you leave feeling revived and ready to face the week ahead. It’s a place where I believe you will be able to release your anxieties and your worries and your fears and hopefully connect in ways you would normally not online. So, without further ado…

A SAFE PLACE TO LAND

Oh, you guys. I’m not sure about you but this week has been a doozy for me. Without getting into too much detail cause I don’t want to get too heavy here but let’s just say it’s been dark. Actually, the beginning of this week was just fine. It felt like heaven. Then, the dark day hit and it seems as though it really never went away. As a matter of fact, even as I type, I’m knee-deep in a swirl of emotions that can’t seem to find their rightful place.

I’ve swung from out of control thoughts that seem extremely unreasonable to downright absurd and borderline scary to shifting back to the other side of things where life is wonderful once again.

Don’t worry, I’ll be fine. I’m not just saying that because I think it’s what you need or want to hear but because I have assurance that the voice of God will always be louder than any fear or lie could ever scream into the ears of my soul. I’ve also been here too many times to count. And, if you’re here and human, I know many of you are already reading this and relating. Perhaps you’re leaning in as these words penetrate and resonate with what you have been experiencing over the week or months or maybe even the year.

I would like to take a moment to say this: “It’s gonna be ok.”

That’s not an empty promise.

I know this from my own experience but I also know that our God is One who is faithful to His word and to His promises. These past few weeks have left me feeling attacked and wondering where in the world my Creator is in the midst of what feels like the most chaotic and tumultuous week of all.

This week I watched our 6-year-old jump from the sofa to the ottoman to the chair over and over again even though I know and he knows it’s against the rules. He’s not being willingly defiant. I honestly believe he just forgets that he’s breaking “the law”. (Or, maybe he just gets all the grace because he’s the youngest but that’s beside the point) In any matter, he jumps freely until I remind him that not only is it not okay for the furniture and it’s inability to continue to support his energy but it’s also just not safe for him. Usually he gives me a bit of a confused look and stops and moves on to something else that’s either equally as unsafe or altogether worrisome.

As I watched him shift from spot-to-spot, I noticed something. He didn’t seem concerned or worried about where or how he would land, he just jumped. He did it with confidence knowing that the stability of our furniture would support the weight of not only his body but the pressure of his leaps.

I know what you’re thinking. You think you know exactly what I’m about to say or the connection I am attempting to make. There is a slight (okay maybe bigger than that) that you do but just in case you don’t I will say it anyhow:

Jesus is our soft place to land.

There, I said it.

The beauty in this statement is that it holds profound truth and is much more than just a catchy phrase or cliche phrase to get your through your moments and days.

This past few days have truly been a test of ALL of my faith and ALL of my endurance and ALL of my trust in Him but at the end of my days, I know, just like Grayson, even in my darkest moments, God is there. He is not just some cute, cuddly, cozy soft place but He is my rock. He is the place that I can always turn to to support me in my darkest hours and will always be there to catch me when I fall or when I don’t see an end to the misery and turmoil I experience inside. It’s a simple reminder that has profound implications, friends.

I tend to let my emotions to lead me. Seems like the more I have responsibility over, the heavier the weight of that becomes. Thoughts swirl and waves come crashing but I’ve found that if I keep my mind focused on the simple goodness of His truths, my ability to “return to sender” on the thoughts that have held me captive, becomes much more strong.

This is my prayer for you (and me) as we head into the week: I pray that your heart and mind would not be held captive by what you see and that in your darkest hours and moments the simple goodness His truth would shine a light so bright that you would become captivated by it all.

You will keep him in perfect peace,
Whose mind is stayed on You,
Because he trusts in You.

Isaiah 26:3

BEYOND THE PUMPKIN | A Few Simple Thanksgiving Tablescapes to Get Your Creative Juices Flowing

I’m all for decorating my home and setting the table with things that I already have in my own home. Now, don’t get me wrong, I LOVE buying new things but when I AM buying those things, I typically try to purchase items that are basics and that I can use beyond just one season.

Insert the settings below that check just about every functional and perfect aesthetic for me. I know I am probably one of the few possibly who aren’t celebrating Christmas right now. I actually just love the fall and all it brings and how it evokes and calls to each of us to enter in to a season of rest and opening opportunity for others to enter into that alongside us—especially in our homes.

With that being said, here are a few non-traditional table settings I’ve rounded up to help get your juices flowing. Most of them I chose because they are simple and allow you to gather things around your home that you already have. Whether it’s mismatched flatware or plates, guaranteed you’ve got just what you need to get the party started.

Prepare yourselves, friends. These are pretty good and these ladies did not hold back on creating timeless tablescapes that would no doubt make anyone in the room linger just a little bit longer.

Via Apartment 34 and The Citizenry

Up first are these two from Apartment 34. I love the '“collected over time” look and feel of these settings. Although I am sure they sourced from some pretty cool artisans, you could also easily duplicate this look by shopping your local thrift and other retailers. I absolutely adore the muted colors and the free flow of the arrangement of the table. Collectively, the setting is frill-free and offers those at the table the ability to be at ease. That’s a feeling I think just about any host would strive for. These (above and below) get the thumbs up from me, for sure.

via Apartment 34 and The Citizenry

via Rip + Tan

Jenni Kayne (above) has been a fave of mine for a few years now and each season she consistently delivers loads of inspiration for home. This one’s from a couple of years back but because of the timeless style she offers, it’s still relevant

via Rose + Ivy

Always a fan of the the contrast that a darker bottom layer brings, this tablescape from Rose and Ivy surely delivers a very traditional punch with a twist. By simply placing the pear on the setting with the cloth napkin not only are you giving opportunity for a “one-stop shop” of sorts for those dining with you but you give the eye somewhere to go which makes guests feel more entertained (crazy how our brains work) and also adds visual interest to the table. This idea continues with the texture of the florals and the ornateness of the gold flatware, the scallop of the plates and even the texture of the bread board. That addition also breaks up the traditional feel and gives the table more of a modern feel. To see more, just click on the link the image caption.

via House of Perez

via House of Perez

Give me muted colors ALL day. I’m a happy girl. This table from House of Perez is surely on my short list of favorites. What I love about going with non-traditional colors and decor is that you don’t have to box yourself in to only using them during a specific time of year and, in this case, the fall. Choosing this option also allows you to save money in the long run as you’re not making seasonal purchases. For most of us, little things like saving money in places like this matter. So, in that case, I’ll consider that a win for us all.

via Wedding Sparrow

Speaking of muted colors, this simple and minimal tablescape nearly stopped me dead in my tracks. And, these plates, guys. My goodness. There’s not one aspect of this table I’m not in love with. If I had to choose a favorite I think those rust orange cloth napkins may be my most favorite thing on this table. This one was pulled together for wedding inspirational purposes but I love that it can absolutely stretch far beyond that in usage.

So, not I wanna know…are you decorating your table for fall or do you save all of your energy for Christmas decor and entertaining? What’s your favorite tablescape above? I hope you’ve been inspired to think a little out of the box and past pumpkins if you are one of those who plans on setting a nice, fun table for Thanksgiving. Lemme know in the comments below and happy, happy decorating, friends!

xo

Kennesha